The Middle Way

Maybe I indulged in a little too much of my vape pen, but I think I get it now when it comes to being zen and the middle way. In Buddhist philosophy, it is mainly seen as a way for individuals to live their lives without being overly indulgent or being to harsh with themselves, i.e. starving.

I was thinking about a conflict a friend is having with her husband and how for me, it wouldn’t have been a conflict, because I just don’t care about how someone else’s relationship with their family affects me as an individual if we are in a relationship.

When you think of a conflict there are always two sides, it’s either this way or that way, but there is a hidden third path or middle way. It’s just not caring or letting these things affect you. Barring it affecting you physically, it is perfectly okay to just drop beef or just not engage. Kind of how SZA is reacting to Nikki’s instigations and attempts to start a beef.

Someone else’s opinions or beliefs don’t have any real bearing on your life or how you live. They don’t wake up with you or go to bed with you. The only opinion or belief system that matters is your own.

Can you imagine how pissed people would be if they tried to start an argument with you, and you just disengaged? They would just make themselves look bad with how irrational they can get.

The heart of conflict is desire. Either you want something, you want someone to think a certain way, you want to feel something, all of those things are desires. By disengaging and not letting those emotions and feelings consume you, you are choosing the middle way. Zen in away. You become hard to ruffle or disrupt. In this way you can find an inner stillness to retreat to when you get anxious thoughts or feelings.

I suffer from anxiety and am a Lexapro hoe. While I appreciate the space it gives me to examine my emotions before acting on them, I think really stopping to explore and ask myself, what desire is behind this uncomfortable feeling, will help immensely. Once you identify the cause, then you can treat the issue, instead of just having a general feeling of dread.